My son, the Angel!

Shanna Fusilier

My son Marc was full term,born on March 5th, 1991. He life was cut short, by an awful heart and genetic disease. He lived only till July 23rd, only to reach the young age of 4 1/2 months. Not to see his 1st birthday, his first Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year! I ask myself all the time, why? Why did this have to happen to my husband and I? What did we do wrong? The only answer that I can seem to find is, just wait till we get to Heaven and maybe then we will have that answer. The only thing that gets me through the day is knowing that he is no longer in any pain, you see in his short life he went through so much! When he was 3 days old he had a heart cath. which determined that he only had 2 chambers to his tiny heart and to go along with that his pulmonary artieries where only as big as 2 UNCOOKED spaghetti strands (they are suppose to be the size of at least your little finger) That was just the beginning. He had no spleen (which he could have lived with) His genetic disorder, which is something that is not in the medical books, was what ultimatly took his life. The doctors are still studying the tissues and samples that they took from him, to try and determine exactly where and what caused this! My son was 10 days old when we received a phone call at 5:00 in the morning, saying that he had had a stroke! When my husband and I got to the hostial, if we would not have known where his bed was in that NICU we could not have found him! He only weighed 5 lbs and he looked as if he weighed 15lbs. He kidneys had stopped functioning and he was on a vent, with IVs and all kinds of other machines to keep him alive. They told us throughout the day that he had severe brain damage and that he would never come off the vent and be able to breathe on his own, or eat on his own! Well My Angel proved them wrong, the doctors soon learned not to say that Marc should not, would not, or could not do anything! Because he always proved them wrong! Within 2 days he was off the vent and sucking on his bottle! Within the next 2 weeks he was home, although with medicines for his heart and weekly trips back to the doctor! But that ok, he made it home!! My Angel stayed home for about 6 weeks, where we all loved him and cherished the time with him. His Big sister loved holding and feeding her baby brother! We were so happy, until June 13th! He got sick at home and ended up back in the hospital this time never to come home again! He spent the next 6 weeks of his life in the PICu at Tulane Medical Center in New Orleans. We made so many friends with doctors and nurses in that time, they all fell in love with My Amgel! I can honestly say that he is an Angel and that I have an Angel in Heaven! I am proud of the life that he had and would do anything to have him just one more day! His daddy and sister both miss him also! I can't wait for the day that we are together again! Till then I hope that he is watching over all of us and having fun with all his friends in that beautiful place he is calling home! All that I can say is that I love him more than anything, and miss him truly!


If you wish to write Shanna you can find her at: [email protected]
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Crisis, Grief, and Healing: Tom Golden LCSW