I lost my husband on 2/3/96. It was a long and painful haul for the both of us. I prayed for quite some time that God would just take him, to end his suffering. We both needed to be relieved and God didn't answer that prayer right away. It took two more long and painful months. I became so angry and frustrated. Then finally on February 3, 1996, when God did take him, I knew that Rick was finally content and at peace. I believed I would be too and was I ever wrong. It was like a big slap in the face... I felt lonely, scarred, confused, shameful and at fault. I am now finally coming around, being able to accept and understand things better. Grief is a feeling that no one can explain and it is somthing that needs to be explored and learned differently by each individual.
I am just greatful that I was able to spend six years of my life in a marriage that was full of love, happiness and dedication. The memories will be kept and cherrished in my heart forever.