Dody McCullough

October 8,1995 my world came to an end. My precious daughter Honey Merie (my only child) was killed in a tragic car accident. Returning from a friend's wedding in Colorado, she and a girlfriend were driving back to Phoenix when she fell asleep at the wheel. She was 24 years old. A few weeks earlier she had announced her engagement to a wonderful young man Tony Krolak. We were in the final stages of planning her engagement party scheduled for October 21. When the door bell rang at 6am my husband and I were expecting to see landscapers to complete the back yard for Honey's party. When Tony entered my bedroom in tears and told me Honey had been killed instantly I could not accept it. It wasn't until my husband walked me into the kitchen upon seeing three police officers that reality hit me. She wasn't due to drive back until Sunday, but she missed Tony so, that she called Saturday after the wedding and said she would be driving home that night. Honey was a beautiful petite young woman with long shining dark hair and the most gorgeous brown eyes and sweetest contagious laugh. At nineteen she purchased her own townhouse. At the time of her death she was working for a prestigious law firm in Phoenix while attending Phoenix College, working toward her law degree. We were true soul mates. We spoke at least 3 times a day if not more. My mornings at work would begin with her call at 8:30"Hi Mom guess what?." It seems there was always something going on in her life. We would go shopping together, out for lunch or breakfast and we talked for hours about life, death, and her dreams. She looked forward to her wedding and having children. I can still see her beautiful smile as she showed off her engagement ring. We hugged and cried. We both had been waiting for this day and I had never seen her happier. At times she would come over and we would rent Chick Flicks and we would cry together. She began dancing at 3 years of age. She was a cheerleader all through Catholic School and on the volleyball team and won first place in speech in high school, competing against schools throughout the state. I would go to each recital, football game, volleyball game and contest and sit in awe of how she always mastered what she attempted. We were the best of friends and ended each conversation with "I love you." I have the most beautiful cards and letters telling me how much she loved me and that her greatest fear in life was losing me. She said she would not want to live without me in here life. I was her world as she was mine. To know me would be to know her and vice versa. Her funeral was beautiful attended by hundreds. My husband Mark (Honey's stepfather, a musician, plays guitar). He wrote a beautiful song for her. She would be thrilled. She nagged me for years to ask Mark to write one for her. He played it at the service as a tribute to her. As difficult as my life is without her. I thank God for every moment we had together and I praise him for taking her quickly and for choosing me to be her mother.

You can send email to Dody at [email protected]
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Crisis, Grief, and Healing: Tom Golden LCSW