My Angel - My Life

Ann Sand

Melissa, the light of my life, the sparkle in my eyes, the best friend I ever had, my only daughter, my youngest child, my love.

Melissa was 13yrs, 11 months and 22 days old when she decided to leave us for a better world. She was (so I thought) a typical pre-teen. She had her highs and her lows. Some days she would be all bubbly and excited-she had just made cheerleading. Or days, that she would cry at nothing at all-a friend didn't return a call. She had high self-esteem, she sang a solo in front of the whole school for a Christmas chorus concert and wasn't even nervous! Melissa had a good life. An older brother who loved her dearly-even though they fought like cats and dogs. A mother and father that have been happily married for 19 years. She was a B honor student and school and very popular.

We still don't understand what caused her to do this. Was it just a low period and she was being dramatic-she always was a great actress. Did she not know that she would die? Did she not realize that death was final? Or was there more to her that we didn't see. Was she truly depressed? Did she have a chemical imbalance? I guess we'll never know. It sure would help if we had some answers.

Melissa came home from school 12-10-97, laughing and talking on the school bus. She had something to eat, did her confirmation homework for that evening, played on the computer, watched MTV and somewhere got lost. I worked late that night and got home at 5:45pm - 10 min too late. Melissa had signed off the computer at 5:35pm , went down stairs to our basement-pulled a chair over, strung up our dog leash, tied it around her neck, and stepped off.

My world has ended. I have such a hole in my soul. I know, Ill never forget this. I know I'll never be the same. I miss her so much and if I could have anything I wished-I wish that I had had a chance to help her. She was a wonderful human being and a much loved sister, friend and daughter. And now, I'll never see her turn into a beautiful lady.

If anyone can help me please email me - HELP

Ann Sand

You can send email to Ann at: [email protected]
mail welcome

anniversary date 12-10-97
date of post 01-08-98

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Crisis, Grief, and Healing: Tom Golden LCSW