A Death without Warning

M. Johnson

Nineteen years young January 1, 1999. My son and he were best friends throughout grammar school and high school. Graduating together from each, always brought friendly competition out between the two of them.

Both left for college in August '98 with their plans and dreams for the future. Each left for different schools to realize their individual pursuits. He lived with us more occasionally on weekends as the two of them were inseparable as friends. He vacationed with us because they always shared growing-up experiences - prom dates, meeting girls, and shunning the "In Crowd." Both were more mature than their age in this world. Good kids! They could see past their peers and their religious

faith and upbringing gave them that "edge."

He is sadly missed by his family, and they are having a hard time as it is. I try to give them as much support as I can.. But my grief seems to be unnoticed as I portray the realities of things to my son. I feel a void as though he were my own. He lived five months with a most swift and aggressive cancer and much pain and suffering, but he was always brave in his fight. His college career was thwarted within the first

three months as diagnosis was made (though he rallied his optimism for recovery rendering a dorm room reservation for this September!)

I can only see his death as a cure for the pain that I saw him endure. For the first time, I want to say "I miss him so." That is, instead of saying "We will" or "We do."

For the first time, I want to say "I miss him so." That is instead of saying "We will" or We do."

My son wrote and gave the eulogy at the funeral. I felt so helpless, but so proud of the words he spoke from his heart and thankful for all we are blessed with for today.

One day at a time............... Marg


You can email Marg: [email protected]
mail welcome

anniversary date 03-22-99
date of post 04-16-99


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Crisis, Grief, and Healing: Tom Golden LCSW

Marg writes about a death without warning.