I have thought a lot of "honor" and "death" these past four years. I have experienced a "death" within my own being as I no longer have the one I once cherished with me. As they left, it seemed apart of me left also. It is apart of me that I will not have returned for all that is left are the memories. We speak of death, and relate it to a physical form of termination where a soul leaves unto a higher power. We do not always speak of the death of "spirit." I have experienced the loss of loved family, friends, worked within hospice, held the hands of those as they pass from this acknowledged world, perhaps into another...and I have lived death while having to remain alive....in the here and now. With this death of spirit came an ultimate birth. I am still in the infant stage currently with much pain remaining. What has allowed me to live again is "Honor." not by anyone else, but by myself. I will not have the ability to verbalize the experience of a "living death" for that experience is beyond any human experience. Yet I did have it. I know of its pain, emptiness, darkness, coldness, hellish essence. But now I live, from a birth that brings forth faith and rejoices with all the essence of our great universe and that of sacredness to each and every individual soul ever created. It is a great "honor" to know of this of oneness within humanity while honestly appreciating its presence. This is to "honor" those who may have felt such a death within themselves and had the faith to hold onto life, even if it was a gasp for a breath.....just one more breath to hold on..... just one more breath...until death would come and birth would take place. No one comes to gather (as our culture does with the laying to rest of a life), in recognition of this, or to pay honor to those who lay quietly within themselves knowing this experience. Today, at this time, in this very moment, I honor my higher power, my own sacredness and that of others all, with all the values of life and its virtues. "Life"....is a miracle, and sometimes "Death" can hold a miracle also. Love, "honor," and blessing's to all sacred souls.........
You can email Abby: [email protected]
date of post 09-04-99