My father was diagnosed with choleogancarcinoma back in 1999, then I didn't realize or maybe just didn't register that cancer is serious. I pretty much ingnored that he was sick just until this last year. It seems like this past year everyday gets worse. Just a week ago the doctors told him had 6 months left.
I constantly sit and wonder how someone so loved and so extremely caring can be taken away.
I have not always been close to my father, it wasn't until I turned 18 that we even stopped butting heads.
When I had children I realized how hard he had to work to take care of us. I sometimes feel that I can't handle all the stress of this situation, then I feel terrible for feeling sorry for my self. Sometimes I wish it were all over so that I wouldn't have to see him in pain, and not know what to say. My husband doesn't know what to say anymore, I don't even know how to feel anymore. I wish there was someone out there to tell me how I am supposed to feel