Losing My Husband

Susie Willhelm

Bob and I had something very few people have before they pass away. We had been told he had 4 months to live. I quit my job and we began doing everything he wanted. We went on a cruise, to visit friends in San Antonio, Laughlin, Vegas, Bluegrass festivals, Catalina,Flagstaff, Mesa Arizonia and many short trips to the river and desert with our six boys and thier families. We had a fabulous 60th birthday party where over 150 people came to celebrate with us. He was overwhelmed. Bob was a retired San Diego fire Captain, played quitar and banjo and had the most beautiful singing voice. WE both had three sons and they had all became great friends. We were together for 9 years.

Bob had liver cancer and he vowed to prove the doctors wrong. Shortly after finding out the bad news we were told that three of our children were going to have babies. We were elated!

We were actually planning on getting married for sometime - but when they told us that Bob was in to kidney failure he told his sons he wanted to get married the next day. Two days before he passed away at home we were married with our boys and thier wives. There wasn't a dry eye in the house. He was able to hold his first newborn baby girl andsaw a video of his grandson just 5 minutes before he passed away.

This was a man I not only loved and admired for the way he loved me - but also the love hehad for his children grandchildren and my sons also. He lived with dignity and he died with it. Never did he complain. He had a sense of humor that just wouldn't quit and a heart as big as Texas. He was the most wonderful, loving man I ever knew. He was my bestfriend.

I am okay when I am in a group - but it is those times alone in the morning and at night and the middle of the nights that just breaks my heart. I can't imagine life without him.

He lived and loved 14 months after the doctor told him 4 months. I wanted him forever.The only thing comforting is the wonderful smile that came over his face after he passed away.It looked like he had just told a good joke or he just saw something he really liked. He actually looked happy. I think he knows something I don't - but someday will. Until then I'll just have to believe he is in a wonderful place. It has been just 5 weeks since loosing him - so I know there is much more saddness and adjustments yet to come.

I love you Bob.

Susie Willhelm

You can send email to Susie Willhelm at [email protected]

mail welcome

Anniversary date - 2000
Date of post - 10-3-00

[return to home page] [column] [book excerpts] [honor page] [discussions page]