In "Loving Losing Learning", I share of the loss of my grandmother (Margaret Lochrie), my son Steven Lewsaw (16), my uncle (James Lochrie) and both of my parents (Maurice and Nettie Ongena). Grief is at times crippling and devastating. Times that are most difficult include birthdays, mother's/father's day, special anniversaries or birthdays, and hardest of all is Christmas. My son Steve was born Dec. 10th, so the grief cycle seems to begin in late December and carry through the holidays. He alsways liked to have the tree put up on his birthday. Christmas has never been the same! While in the process of publishing my book, my sister (Peg Flaglor) was diagnosed with brain cancer. We had 3 wonderful months together before she died. One of her favourite passtimes was playing bingo. When we played during those 3 months, I was reminded to "make those memories" while I could. As I now write this (Jan/09) yet another family member has been diagnosed with stage 4 brain cancer. Loss is something we can't avoid, but I continue to learn ways to cope. One big step is simply recognizing and acknowledging the things that trigger the grief - dates, special songs, familiar smells, and of course - the holiday season.
Bonnie