Loss of a Loved One


In 1997, on Tuesday, January 21, my good friend Shaun called me and invited me to a party to celebrate his birthday. He would turn 18 years old the next day, and his friends were to through him a birthday party on the following Friday night in honor of the occasion. I remember him telling me he really wanted me to be there with him. We lived in different towns, about 40 miles from each other, so sometimes it was hard to see much of each other.

We would usually see each other a couple weekends a month, and the rest of the time we relied on weekly phone calls to keep us close. When he invited me to the party, I told him that I didn't think I would be able to go, but I would try my hardest. On Friday afternoon, I came home to see his number on my caller ID, but there was no message. I ended up not going to the party that night, and I stayed home and went to bed early. The next morning I woke up to the phone call that would change my life forever.

After a high school basketball game, Shaun and some friends went to his good friend "Larry's" house to start the party. About 11:00 when the party started to get out of hand, the parents where the party was being held, started asking people to settle down, and to start to head home. As Shaun was walking from the back of the house toward the front, he discovered that "Larry" had began fighting with another boy. Shaun stepped in to help "Larry" out, and was stabbed twice by another boy who had not been involved in the initial fight. The second stab wound pierced Shaun heart. He died within minutes of being stabbed, on the cold winter ground, in the arms of a close friend. I found out early the next morning what had happened and I did not believe what I had heard. In a way I still don't to this day. I miss him and love him so much, and even though it has been over three years since he passed away, I am still as sad as the day it happened. Shaun and I had twin souls, we were very close, we were close in a way that most people aren't.

Shaun was a good friend to everyone who knew him. He loved sports and his favorite athlete was Shaquille O'Neil. He had a superman tattoo, and some people called him "Super Shaun." Shaun was not of this world. He was the best listener that there could ever have been. He was kind, compassionate, and caring for everyone who was around him including people that he didn't even know that well. He wanted to be a police officer when he got out of school, and he always knew that he wanted to raise a family. He would always do what ever he could to help a friend out. In an essay he wrote in August of 1996, he described himself as being a pretty good person, who liked to help his friends. In that essay, he described himself perfectly. I will always remember Shaun for being there for me no matter what, for being a good listener, and for always standing up for me. But most of all I will remember him as being the second part of my soul. I miss him greatly, but I find great joy in knowing that he is in heaven, and I will see him again someday. "We will breath together again someday, Shaun. I miss and love you more than you could ever imagine..."


You can send email to Melissa at [email protected]

mail welcome

Anniversary date - 1-22-97
Date of post - 6-5-00

[return to home page] [column] [book excerpts] [honor page] [discussions page]