Michelle Shannon Rutherford...Words could never explain Michelle. She was the greatest friend I have ever had and she left me too soon. I feel as though I have been cheated and robbed. She would call me at work everyday to see how I was and to perhaps make plans for after work. Boy, I still miss getting those calls and hearing her voice. Sometimes, when I answer my phone, I get an eerie feeling that it will be her. We spend most of our time together...we were two peas in a pod...some might even say we were soulmates. Regardless, I know one thing, I am lost without her. I have an emptiness inside and will never go away. The memories I have, I cherish as if they are gold. She's on my mind and in my heart every moment of every day.
Michelle left Brittany here with us. Brittany is now 10 years old. She's an angel...she's my angel and she's my link to her mother. I spend as much time as I can with Brittany. We go places and do things together and she spends weekends with me. I feel that it is just one of the things I can do for her. I owe her my love and my attention...she is all that I have left of Michelle. She is such a beautiful little girl and I love her with all my heart. She is so much like her mother. I have big plans for her when she grows up. She's going to be important.
Two years have gone by and it feels more like ten years. As every day passes, it does not get easier to deal with. Some days I think it just gets harder. And the pain, it has not subsided any. It hurts today as much as it hurt 2 years ago. And I believe that it will always hurt this bad, no matter what anyone says.
Until the day when Michelle and I get to see each other again, I think of all the time we spent together and how knowing her has changed my life forever.
Michelle...I miss you dearly and I love you with all my heart.
I have learned that you should always leave loved ones with loving words.
It may be the last time you see them.
I have learned that there are people who love you dearly but just don't know how to show it.
I have learned that my best friend and I can do anything or nothing and have the best time.
I have learned that it's not what you have in your life, but who you have in your life that counts.
I have learned that your family won't always be there for you. It may seem funny, but people you are not related to can take care of you, love you, and teach you to trust people again. Families are not necessarily biological.
I have learned that the people that you care about most in life are taken from you too soon.
I have learned that writing, as well as talking, can ease emotional pain.
I just wish I could learn how to make the pain and sorrow go away, or at least subside a little.