Mom in Heimatland


Yvonne Thomas

My mom died very unexpectedly last year from lung cancer. We had no idea what was going on. She kept getting sicker and sicker during Christmas break. Finally the last doctor visit she was told that the large mass in her chest was either cancer or an enlarged thyroid. I went back to school, and less than a week later my roommate found me at school and told me I needed to get home. My mom had a seizure and was in the hospital. I drove the 3 1/2 hours back home, and found out it was terminal, it had been cancer, and the reason she had had a seizure was because she had about 6 brain tumors.

I was very upset with all this. I learned some very important things: don't ever plan. We all thought my dad would be the first one to pass away because he was older and he had had heart surgery when I was in 4th grade. But it wasn't him. Not that I wanted it to be, but don't ever think something is a sure bet. I also learned that I have some awesome friends who were there for me then and are there for me now as I still struggle with this issue. I don't think this pain will ever go away, but I do hope that eventually it will become a dull ache instead of the throbbing pain it is now. I feel very lost right now. My mother and I got along great, and I really miss her. She was the main reason I am pursuing a degree in German, but ever since this I have not been very motivated with school, and it has constantly been a struggle.

I would love to have email correspondence with people who have shared a similar experience. I have read a few books, but I find that talking about it also helps. Thank you for your time to read this and let me vent.

Yvonne Thomas



You can send email to Yvonne at: ythomas@nmsu.edu
mail welcome


anniversary date 01-18-97
date of post 01-18-98

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Crisis, Grief, and Healing: Tom Golden LCSW