My Best Friend and Fiance, Kurt


Lisa A. Menadue

Kurt and I fell in love 3 years ago. Last fall we began to make our wedding plans for Nov 1, 1997. On January 15th, we received a call from Kurt's doctor. Kurt was having what we thought were ulcer problems. It turned out that he really had stomach cancer. We were devastated. He was only 37 years old. This type of disease strikes very elderly people, not someone as young and healthy as Kurt.

On February 1, Kurt underwent a 12.5 hour surgery to remove the tumor. They told us they got all they could see, but that he'd need radiation and chemotherapy to get any microscopic cells. Kurt recovered beautifully from the surgery and did very well w/the first round of treatment. Through it all, we managed to find a lot of happiness and love. Kurt never really got sick from the chemo, he'd get run down a bit towards the end of treatment.

Our trouble returned in early May - the cancer had spread to his bones. He began a 2nd round of treatment, but we knew we would have a tough time beating this out. So we planned on moving our wedding day to this December. We never got that chance. Kurt contracted pneumonia, and the powerful antibiotics they used could not help. His immune system was so compromised from both the cancer and the treatment.

I lost Kurt on 7/1 of this year. He died peacefully, w/his friends and family and loved ones by his side. It hurts so much to even think of this day. I am sure he is in a beautiful place, but I feel so lost here without him. Our future together is gone. All I can pray for is that when my time comes, he'll be right there to take me. I love you, Kurt. With all my heart.


Lisa A. Menadue



You can send email to Lisa at menadue_l@a1.tch.harvard.edu
mail welcome


anniversary date 7-1-96
date of post 10-26-96

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Crisis, Grief, and Healing: Tom Golden LCSW